Let's bring sexy back. It's time to ditch thirst traps and looking for double-takes. That feeling of sexy comes in different ways and we need to explore them. Why rely on other people to make you feel sexy when you can do it yourself?
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For me, sexiness is basically the same thing as confidence. Confidence wins people over more than an ass ever will. Owning a room is one of the sexiest things a person can do. I am not getting my usual fix. So here are some ways I boost myself up because nobody is checking me out. Making yourself feel sexy gives YOU control and you're not relying on randomers liking your photos for subconscious approval.
For the most part, being sexy is about having your shit somewhat together.
There's a reason it's called a hot mess instead of a sexy mess.
Hot is girl-next-door.
Sexiness is the girl in your door.
You see, feeling sexy isn't as complicated as you may think. In order to be sexy, you just have to feel sexy. It's that simple! This feeling of sexiness can come from a multitude of ways that aren't sexual. And that all depends upon YOU and what makes YOU feel good. Since sexiness doesn't always involve sex, here are a few nonsexual things that can help you feel sexy, confident, and powerful.
1. Matching underwear.
Matching clothes of any description will do, whether it be a suit or a matching gym combo. You tell me you don’t feel bomb walking in a power suit or squatting in a gym co-ord. You have your shit together. It doesn’t have to be too fancy but just in the same color theme. Black bra with a black lace thong? Groundbreaking.
2. Dancing.
One word. Lizzo. There are one hundred songs I could put down here but when you bust out a few moves like you’re in a music video, you feel like THE hottest shit. We all know that’s the height of sexiness. Add on the hairbrush as your microphone and off you go.
3. Lipstick.
Ruby Woo, Viva Glam, Cake, Blankety Velvet Teddy. All icons. Lipstick is the thing that makes me feel done up. Fenty Glossbomb with Glossier’s Cake is my combination of choice. Thank me later.
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4. Driving.
With the windows down wearing your sunglasses and blaring some decent fucking music. You don’t need make-up, just throw on those shades over your eye bags. Driving just makes you feel independent and you have your shit together. You also have your radio acting as a soundtrack to your life while you pass by people waiting at the bus stop. Music is always up to the individual but here is a nice hot girl playlist to get those sexy feelings flowing: Spotify Hot Girl Playlist
5. Reading in public.
Seriously who is she? It’s so much more than a meet-cute. There is nothing more liberating than being confident in your own company and expanding your mind. Picture this, you’re sitting on a park bench in the sun with a great book. What more do you need? Nothing because that is complete sexiness.
6. Skincare routine.
Who has it more together than someone with a toner, cleanser, serum, and moisturizer in the routine? Glowing skin can be your canvas and you don’t need anything else. Even a nice facemask here and there helps (you don't have to get crazy with facemasks either you can literally put food on your face like yogurt, avocado/honey, lemon/sugar, watermelon, strawberries, coffee grounds). That feeling of being cozy in your pajamas with a glow and freshly brushed teeth is a simple pleasure.
7. Cocktails.
Ahh, a delicious drink. Sweet and comes with a buzz. Liquid confidence in a high stool and from a nice glass. There is a certain atmosphere in a cocktail bar that has an undertone of seduction. So, hanging out with one makes you sexy by association.
8. New clothes.
This grows your confidence with an outfit that is more daring than you’re used to. You may have some shapewear on underneath it but who cares. It doesn’t have to be some fast fashion consumers. Honestly, thrifting and vintage shopping mean nobody else will show up in the same outfit. Standing out is sexy. Slap on a pair of high heels and it takes it up a notch. But remember comfort is the only style that will outperform trends and fads.
9. Smelling good.
One of the most sensory invoking sensations is the smell. Have you ever walked past someone and wanted to follow them sheerly based on their scent? Pure primal pheromones. So get a signature scent. This doesn’t have to be expensive. I love Zara’s perfumes or a nice body lotion with gum and lip balm. Job done.
10. Clean sheets.
It's is very underrated sexy feeling. Clean and fresh where you spend eight hours of the day and sexy time. Need I say more?
11. Fake tan.
Where I’m from it rains 225 days of the year so I’m pale. Like really pale. The fake tan game has improved leaps and bounds in the last few years. Also, who wants skin cancer? Um, no one... Having a tan reminds me of being on vacation and clothes just seem to look better with a glow. It just gives me the feeling of contouring my body in all the right ways. Here are some good fake tans to help you out; Jergens, St. Tropez, Coco and Eve, Bondi Sands, St. Moriz.
(Pro tip: if you want to get fancy, buy an automatic spray bottle off amazon and fill it with self-tanner. Game changer)
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Like beauty, sexiness is in the eye of the beholder. You never know what other people will find sexy about you. It could be the way you tie back your hair or your posture. These are just some things I noticed that do it for me. Feel empowered put on your lipgloss and be fucking confident. Be that person on your resume. Confidence will always be the ultimate turn-on. It's a state of mind. Try some of these out or just try to find out what nonsexual things make YOU feel sexy.